Ten Reasons Why I Never Wash*
- I was forced to as a child.
- People who wash are hypocrites - they think they are cleaner than everybody else.
- There are so many different kinds of soap, I can't decide which one is best.
- I used to wash, but I got bored and stopped.
- I wash only on special occasions, like Christmas and Easter.
- None of my friends wash.
- I'll start washing when I get older and dirtier.
- I can't spare the time.
- The bathroom is never warm enough in winter or cool enough in summer.
- People who make soap are only after your money.
*If you don't get it, try substituting another series of words for "wash." If you still don't get it, you probably won't think it is funny anyway.
http://www.godandscience.org/humor/neverwash.html